Thursday, August 21, 2014

Mom Kuhns

We try to travel every summer to visit friends and family; however,  this year, hubby decided to travel to Ohio in the spring instead of summer which we normally do.  He also planned for us to visit the Smoky Mountains in Tennessee after a couple days in Ohio. This year is extra special because I will be seeing my best friend Jojit  in Ohio for the first time since she came to the United States over a year ago.  I was not able to attend her wedding day because of my school schedule, so to see her again was pure excitement. She and her husband John are coming with us to Tennessee too, so we have plenty of time together. At that time I was emotionally a wreck.  I felt physically sick which I believe reflected how I felt inside, depressed and frustrated.  I am just so blessed with my husband who knows my needs and somehow knows how to meet them  by taking me to the shopping mall and trying to listen to my complaints. I am not that always bad when I feel frustrated, I have my moments too like normal people (boy, am I so defensive!)  My husband is super nice to me even if I act like a brat sometimes, but he does not seem to mind it(bless his heart).  In any case,  I needed to get away, and I needed to see my best friend.

 This was taken in Dollywood, Tennessee.  We love the place and we are planning to visit there again next year.

 My best friend and me

It was almost six o'clock when we got to their place.  I immediately jumped out of the car and ran to their entrance door where she was waiting for our arrival.  Jojit and I were screaming, hugging and jumping! Nothing changed.  We are still the best of friends.  Instead of pouring  out my misery to  Jojit, I found myself laughing and just having my best of times with her.  Her presence comforted me a lot, but it was not until one afternoon when we visited Mom Kuhns( Jojit's mom-in-law), and she shared with us her life back in the past that I felt encouraged and comforted. Her stories opened my heart. The positive attitude that she had shown in different circumstances captured my attention.   Yes, her stories were funny; in fact,  I could not stop laughing while listening to her.  I have not laughed that hard for years, and it felt good.  Her stories were entertaining, but that was not all; I also learned something.  I realized that she had a positive attitude that I lack.  She had that openness, that trust and self-denial that I lack.  I started to see things differently through her.  I left Mom's place a changed person.  I felt good and awesome! In case you are wondering what this drama is all about, I withdrew  from the nursing class because I was failing. THERE! I said it.  Some people may have trouble understanding my disappointment and frustration. You are not alone.  I too do not understand why whenever the EAGLES football team loses against the Cowboys my husband looks so SAD and somehow very frustrated. We may have different frustrations in life, but the bottom line is how we handle them. My husband handles Eagle losses by talking to his son about the game over the phone, rolling his eyes up and says, "ayayay!"  I handled mine with lots of crying and complaining.  I want to change that, which is not easy, but I know I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. I want to have that positive attitude that Mom Kuhns had and trust the Lord even if I feel confused and at a loss when I do not see lights at the end of the tunnel. I decided to  try to go back in the spring to tackle the class.  I am learning to not ever give up on my dreams and not to whine when things do not go as planned.    

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